Day Three Hundred and Thirty Seven - Is Comfort Really That Important?

It's early in the morning. Still probably dark out. It's cold. I wrap myself up in my blanket, grab my bible and my favorite pen that Anthem got me and my notebook and shuffle out into the kitchen and start the coffee pot that's going to be full of black tea, and turn on a light and sit down at the kitchen table and start my day right. And I know some days she'll be there before me, and I know some days she'll wait until the tea is done  before she shuffles out of her room. And some days the person crashing on the couch will pull the covers over their head and grumble about why our house starts moving at before the sun comes up, and sometimes they'll come and join us. 

Our fridge will always be empty, but our stomachs full. Our house will be cold, but our hearts warm, and we'll have so many blankets. I know I'm called to communal living. Not in the hippy sense where we're communists and share everything. Maybe someday. I mean, I really do enjoy organic food, but I digress. It will be our place, my HLM and I. But there will always be people there. Always. We'll always be feeding people, worshiping with people, having a disney night, having an xbox night, etc. Which is sort of hilarious, considering we're both introverts. Which is why it is absolutely necessary that our rooms are private. But our living room and kitchen might as well belong in a dorm for how much they'll be used by people not us. 

And honestly, even though I know that's what I'm being called to, and what I want, even the thought fills me with a little bit of anxiety. But it's not about what I'm comfortable with. It's about what God wants. Some days I'm not comfortable approaching God as the all powerful King, Lord, and Holy of Holies that He is, but He wants me to worship Him for that. Some days it's hard to lean on His grace and come boldly before the throne as His beloved child, but He wants that too. 

I am so much more filled when I worship and live as He requires, rather than how I am comfortable.