Day Two Hundred and Eighty Five - Do You Trust?

Let's say that everything you ever wanted is anywhere but here. And I'm not saying I'm staying, dear Lord, please God, no. But let's say, let's say I went with wisdom and my checkbook and stayed here for a year longer. Moved in with a friend, new part of town, new job, but stayed. 

It would ruin three of my biggest reasons for leaving. 

1) To escape the ghosts on the corners.

2) To explore a new town and find life in it.

3) To find a church with people that are a real community, not a social club. 

But could I still rejoice? Could I still trust that God was behind this? That God was working for my good as I sought His will? Maybe... maybe the problem with this town isn't this town. Maybe it's me. Maybe, with a little help, I could find a town I never thought existed. Maybe, with a little help, I could find the community that has eluded me for so long. Maybe, with a little humility, I can get over myself enough to give it all a chance. 

At least for a while. I still want to move, and get away from here. But a year of saving up doesn't sound like a terrible idea either. Especially considering in another year I'll have paid off 2 of my 3 student loans. It's just a thought. A thought because I have an interview tomorrow and ironically, it's in the town I live in. A thought because thinking through every scenario is what I do. Obsessively. 

And no matter what happens, or where I move, or where I stay, or what I do - I will trust. I will trust that He is with me, I will trust that He knows whats best, and I will trust that I am doing the absolute best I can to follow Him and that He will honor that. And I will trust that He is working for my good. Sometimes, our definitions of good are different. But His is always best.