Day One Hundred and Ninety - I'm A Christian, Not A Masochist

I'm a Christian, not a masochist. Please stop confusing the two. It is really starting to bother me.

"Forgive and forget" is not a phrase to be found in the Bible. Google it. It's not there. Jesus never said it. Because it's really horrible advice. Forgiving is really good. Forgiveness is one of the defining characteristics of a Christian. Forgetting makes you an idiot. And a masochist. I am not a masochist.

I've been a bad friend in the past. I'll be a bad friend in the future. I'm prone to mistakes. And I seem to be a slow learner most times, so I'm prone to making them over and over again. And I'll need forgiveness. But at no point in time will I ask a friend to forget the times I've messed up. That would be bad for both of us.

If you forget the ways in which I fail, or turn a blind eye to them, then you will probably be hurt by them again, and will be unable to help me do them less. I need my friends to not forget my weaknesses so that they can help me be stronger.

We are to be patient, as Christians. To be loving. To be kind. To forgive over and over again. We are to forgive as many times as we are wronged. We are to forgive our enemies and bless those that curse us. But no where does it say to be intimate with our enemies, or to be friends with those who consistently treat us poorly. I will love those who hate me, but I will not invite them into my life to let them wreak havoc. God never called us to be masochists in our personal lives, in our emotional lives.

I have two friends that are guilty of being a Christian Masochist, and it comes from a severe misinterpretation of Christian love. Their boyfriend and girlfriend, respectively, are emotionally abusive. They lie, cheat, degrade, accuse, belittle, and ignore my dear friends. And in the name of love, both of them put up with it. "God wants me to love them." They say. Yes! Yes, He does. And the best way to love them is to love them from afar. To love them and pray for them far removed from them. Love isn't saying, "It's okay that you treat me like this," for that is teaching them that others will put up with their abuse as well. And that's certainly not what we're after, is it? Encouraging them in their abuse? No. God was never talking about your significant other. He was talking about REAL persecution. REAL enemies. People who would throw you in jail, people who had the power to kill you if you didn't recant your faith in Him.

So for all that is good and sugary in this world, please come to understand the difference. Please. I will not be a masochist in the name of Christ and I highly suggest you not as well. Do NOT misinterpret Christian for Punching Bag. Christians are allowed to have self respect too. And I'm going to use mine, and walk away from those I once called friends who no longer act like one. That doesn't make me a bad Christian. It just means I'm not a masochist.